i am pink

I have just come from a weekend women's conference at Gateway Church called "Pink Impact." There is so much on my heart that I want, desire, need to share with all of you but I just can't seem to get the words to describe all that God showed me the last few days. I am awed by His power, purpose and timing.

Do you ever get those moments where you know God was directly speaking to you? Well this happened for me this weekend. I did not really think I wanted to go to this conference first of all. Since our house has been non-stop the last few weeks, I felt like I needed to take a time of rest to get back on track. I never really felt at peace about leaving my house with laundry, dishes and bags that are still waiting to be unpacked and not to mention that it just needed a good dusting and vaccuming. The conference started Thursday night. Wednesday night, I was laying in bed praying the prayer of the week "God do I go or stay home and get caught up?" Thursday morning-I woke feeling like I needed to be there. You know those moments where you feel in your gut you will miss out on something extraordinary if you don't go?!?! Well this is what I was feeling. I called my mom to tell her I was going and she said, "Good I prayed for you today to have peace about going."

Already as I begin to type out the first part of what God showed me I can feel tears coming up to the surface yet again. I am telling you it was that moving! How do I put into words everything that God showed me? Not someone else, me! You see, blog friends, family non-blog friends, everything and I mean everything that I have struggled with ALL my life was dealt with these last few days. EVERYTHING! Now I have broken free from a lot of the bondage from my past-Thank ya Jesus! (I have been reading Yada Yada Prayer Group-hence the "Thank ya Jesus" being added to my vocabulary not that it wasn't there before I just say it like Flo-read the books you will understand) But never have I dealt with the shame of my college years. Folks if you knew me in college you would not even recongize me today. If you did know me and are thinking "Well, you weren't that bad!" Then you saw Suzie Sunday School-you did not see Suzie Sinner! I was the queen of the mask! I was the queen of appearances. I wanted the church kids to think I was still acting like a church kid. I wanted the non-church kids to think that I was one of them. Although i assure I stuck out like a sore thumb-especially when i did not follow most of the lingo that went with the party lifestyle. I was not an authentic Christian. I was not allowing God to move and transform me the way that He wanted and desired for my life. Over the last 10 years, I have gone through a major rehaul. I am still a work in progress. But the last few days I have gone from acting to being the Christain leader God has called me to be.

Tune in later-I will write more but I getting to the good stuff so I need to go pray it out!
God bless!